My Vincent,
I'm sorry for tonight. I, I really don't know why I get so upset when you say what is, I guess, the honest truth. I don't know what will become of us, but I try to keep all of the negative parts out of my mind. I don't ever want to lose you. It scares me that I possibly could one day. I know you love me and I know you care about me, but for I'm still a very paranoid person. I always worry if I'm good enough for you because I've been told before that I'm not good enough to live, or that I have no reason to even love someone because they'll never love me. I understand that the past is over with and what people have told me shouldn't matter, but it sticks with me. I know I'm not the most beautiful girl in the world and...I don't know..I DO think I'm beautiful now because of you. Maybe tonight I just wasn't feeling as 'hot.' I put you on this pedestal because I see you as so wonderful and, y'know, beautiful. You make me so happy and feel wanted. You genuinely want me. I shouldn't of cried. There honestly was no legit reason to. For any and every reason that I cried, I can promise you that it wasn't your fault. You're doing nothing wrong, baby. You're doing what it's best for you and I know you're not trying to hurt me. It's not that I'm hurt, it's just...this situation isn't the exact kind I'd prefer to be in. But, I'm in love with you and love, heh, isn't easy. Of course we're going to struggle. Of course we're going to argue. But, at the end of all the tears and explanations, I still love you. That cannot change. My love for you is permanent. And, I hope, no, KNOW, with all that I have, you're the one who's going to be mine..in a greater sense, yeah? Yeah. I said most of this on the phone..but it's just so much easier to type it out.
Please don't hate me in the morning.
I love you, Vincent.
I carry your heart. I carry it in my heart.
<3>
I'm sorry for tonight. I, I really don't know why I get so upset when you say what is, I guess, the honest truth. I don't know what will become of us, but I try to keep all of the negative parts out of my mind. I don't ever want to lose you. It scares me that I possibly could one day. I know you love me and I know you care about me, but for I'm still a very paranoid person. I always worry if I'm good enough for you because I've been told before that I'm not good enough to live, or that I have no reason to even love someone because they'll never love me. I understand that the past is over with and what people have told me shouldn't matter, but it sticks with me. I know I'm not the most beautiful girl in the world and...I don't know..I DO think I'm beautiful now because of you. Maybe tonight I just wasn't feeling as 'hot.' I put you on this pedestal because I see you as so wonderful and, y'know, beautiful. You make me so happy and feel wanted. You genuinely want me. I shouldn't of cried. There honestly was no legit reason to. For any and every reason that I cried, I can promise you that it wasn't your fault. You're doing nothing wrong, baby. You're doing what it's best for you and I know you're not trying to hurt me. It's not that I'm hurt, it's just...this situation isn't the exact kind I'd prefer to be in. But, I'm in love with you and love, heh, isn't easy. Of course we're going to struggle. Of course we're going to argue. But, at the end of all the tears and explanations, I still love you. That cannot change. My love for you is permanent. And, I hope, no, KNOW, with all that I have, you're the one who's going to be mine..in a greater sense, yeah? Yeah. I said most of this on the phone..but it's just so much easier to type it out.
Please don't hate me in the morning.
I love you, Vincent.
I carry your heart. I carry it in my heart.
<3>
0 comments:
Post a Comment